Lisa Stardust: Narcissistic Attention Whore

Lisa Stardust is the poster-child for everything that is wrong with astrology.

As a practicing astrologer who predicted the outcomes of the last two presidential elections through the stars, it’s safe to say that the astrology of Election Day can impact the results immensely.

Lisa, whatever quackery you’re practicing is not astrology. You didn’t predict the outcomes of the last two elections. You had a 50-50 chance and you got lucky. That’s the only thing that happened.

In the past, many elements have brought chaos to the election; however, this time, the vibe is more unpredictable due to the lack of havoc in the sky….“Without specific energies at play, it’s up to each astrologer to determine the factors impacting the charts of all the candidates,…”

Like a typical charlatan huckster, you created a built-in “escape clause” so’s you can blame your spectacular failure on everyone and everything but you in true narcissistic fashion.

Astrology is a rules-based scientific study of Fate. It isn’t “up to each astrologer to determine the factors.” It’s up to each astrologer to follow the rules laid down 2,600 years ago and obviously you’re clueless. The only factors that matter are those in the charts of the candidates.

Transits are not used to make predictions since transit-to-natal is not a primary predictive method. The fact that people used transit-to-natal as a predictive method does not make it a predictive method. It just means they were clueless and didn’t understand what they were doing. Anyone who knows anything at all about astrology knows that since its revival in the 1890’s, transit-to-natal was a “hit-or-miss” method and 80% of the time it was a “miss.” Even for the 20% of the time when there was “hit” it was wrong. The wonderful thing predicted to happen to a client turned out to be the worst nightmare or the terrible thing predicted to happen to a client turned out be good.

Astrologers could not know why that was true because they were denied access to the critical Greek, Arabic and Pahlavi manuscripts necessary to sort the whole mess out. That changed in 1990 when Otto Neugebauer (thankfully) died and David Pingree retired. For the first time, astrologers now had access to those manuscripts. The reasons why transit-to-natal does not work were discovered in 1994.

Obviously, you didn’t get the memo. Then again, since you’re, um, you know, an “expert” and a legend in your own mind it would be beneath your dignity to study current trends in astrology.

People, whenever you see someone talking about “energies” that is your first clue they’re not an astrologer. Lisa Stardust is so clueless she couldn’t find a clue even if she smeared herself with clue musk and did the clue mating dance singing the clue mating call in a field of horny clues.

“The waxing crescent moon in Sagittarius will still be feeling the intensity from November 1’s new moon in Scorpio. This means that a drastic change is coming.”

Cite the authority that supports your claim. Oh, that’s right. We forgot. You just make things up as you go along. In which house is Moon posited? Do you not understand Moon’s presence in a sign is meaningless unless you know which house Moon is in?

“Both moon signs on Election Day will be aspecting the first house of the astrology birth chart of the United States which is calculated for July 4, 1776 at the signing of the Declaration of Independence (note that the ascendant of the chart is 12 degrees Sagittarius).”

Lisa, thanks for proving that not only do you suck as an astrologer, you also suck as a historian.

You’re way, way behind on your memos. It seems that in addition to not getting the memo proving transit-to-natal is not a predictive method, you didn’t get the 1906 memo which proves irrefutably that nothing happened on July 4th.

Yes, that’s right. It’s been a matter of irrefutable fact and record since 1906 that nothing happened on July 4th because it wasn’t possible for anything to happen. For one thing, on July 2nd the New York Delegation received a notice by messenger that they were not allowed to sign anything. Because that is true, on July 3rd the New York Delegation left Philadelphia to return to New York and as a result, at least 9 other delegates and possibly as many 14 other delegates left Philadelphia so they weren’t even there on July 4th.

Those men were not as stupid as you are. They’re not going to sign an unofficial document knowing in advance they’d have to make changes to that document. When the New York Delegation returned on July 15th, they spent the next four days redrafting the Declaration and completed it on July 19th. It was sent to the printer’s to be engrossed on over-sized parchment and it was signed August 2nd.

Even the U.S. government says that’s what happened so how dumb are you?

But for the sake of argument, and to prove what a fraud you really are, we’ll indulge your drug-induced hallucinogenic fantasies for just a moment.

A Declaration Chart is the equivalent of a Conception Chart. The purpose of a Conception Chart is to answer questions pertaining to the development and birth of the fetus. Once the fetus is miscarried or aborted, or there is a still-birth or live birth, the chart expires. Likewise, a Declaration Chart only tells you if the entity declaring independence actually gains independence. Once the end is known, the Declaration Chart expires. Accordingly, the Sibley Chart expired on January 14, 1784 when “the united States in Congress assembled” ratified the Treaty of Paris.

Is English not your first language?

Daca vrei putem sa vorbim in romaneste.

Würdest du besser auf Deutsch verstehen?

Are you a Serb? Croat? Hunter can speak Serbian and fumble his way thru Russian and Ukrainian. We think this will help you a lot:

https://www.rif.org/

That’s “Reading is Fundamental.” They can help you understand the big words in the Declaration and the Articles of Confederation.

The Declaration creates 13 independent sovereign countries not one single country. Little brains like you don’t seem to understand state = country.

Article II of the Articles of Confederation: Each state retains its sovereignty, freedom and independence….

The States cannot retain something they never had in the first place. Since we’re so underwhelmed with your astrology skills we’ll help you with this chart:

Palestine’s bid for independence was DOA (Dead On Arrival).

Mars domicile ruler of the Scorpio 8th House in the Aries 1st House. Just like a natal chart indicates that person will indirectly cause their own death, so it is here. The Palestinian Authority were indirectly the cause of their failure to gain independence.

Do you understand why a country mundane chart has nothing to do with elections and cannot be used to predict the winners of elections?

Obviously, you don’t.

Astrology does not rule every second of every minute of every hour of every day of every week of every month of every year of your life. Astrology doesn’t care about the silly stupid banal trivialities of everyday life. That is why you cannot predict whether you will or won’t go to work, or will or won’t have dinner at a corporate big box restaurant or will or won’t have sex or will or won’t find a new significant other or whether you will or won’t get into a fight with your significant other.

Eating, drinking, peeing, forming relationships and having sex is what people do. There’s nothing special or notable about that.

So it is with mundane charts. Search high and low and you’ll never predict when the government passes legislation or does anything else, like holding elections, because that is part-and-parcel of what countries do in the ordinary course of business. Yes, elections are the minutia of mundane charts.

“Therefore, the outcome of people actually voting will be the highest it has ever been.”

No, Lisa, that is not what it means and you’re wrong. The 2020 Election had a higher voter turnout than the 2024 Election. If you would practice astrology instead of herstrology and stop making things up as you go along you might actually get something right.

“With Uranus, a planet that is known for its radical nature, moonwalking through the midheaven of Donald Trump and J.D. Vance’s birth charts, there will be unforeseen issues occurring on Election Day, as well as dynamic shifts in the way the public perceives them.”

Moonwalking? Is that an astrological term or is that just something you made up to sound cool? Uranus, Neptune and Pluto are nothing-burgers that mean nothing and do nothing but we do thank you for proving us right.

What were those “unforeseen issues”? If you really were an astrology you should have been able to tell us what they were. Not surprisingly, there were no unforeseen issues because Uranus never does anything in anyone’s chart.

If we look at Kamala Harris’s chart, both Saturn and Neptune are residing in her midheaven, which means that there is a commitment to a new dream propelling her forward.

Cite your source for that delineation or are you talking out of both sides of your neck?

There are no authorities to support your make-it-up-as-you-go-along delineation. The standard Modern astrology delineation is:

“You may have to contend with negative moods that can be quite upsetting.”

That’s been the standard since the year 1910 when Alan Leo and Llewellyn George wrote their books. Too bad you didn’t read them. Of course, you would have to go to the RIF website and learn how to read before you attempted to read their books.

“Unfortunately, we do not know Tim Walz’s birth time to navigate his chart;…”

Fortunately, we don’t need the chart of Tim Walz. If you were an astrologer you would know that. Too bad you’re not an astrologer.

“…however, he does have a favorable aspect from his Sun forming conjunction, the transiting North Node of Destiny.”

There’s no such thing as a “North Node of Destiny” but man does it sound really, really cool. We’re sure you wowed a whole bunch of suckers with that.

Oh, and it makes you sound really important, too. If you were really an astrologer you’d know the nodes are not used in natal or mundane astrology. They’re used in the other branch of astrology, you know, the one with horary charts and electional charts. Since you’re so stupid, we should probably explain electional charts have nothing to do with political elections. They’re used to determine the most opportune time to do something.

“Harris and Walz do have the best charts to win the election.”

No, they don’t and if you were an astrologer you’d know that because Kamala’s chart screams failure so you didn’t even interpret her natal chart correctly.

A novice astrologer with less than 3 months experience would have seen the 8 big giant humongous gargantuan red flags indicating Kamala Harris can never be president of the U.S.

1. Mercury domicile ruler of the Gemini Ascendant afflicted in the Scorpio 6th House
2. Venus in the Virgo 4th House and domicile master of the Gemini Ascendant afflicted by Mercury
3. Jupiter in the Taurus 12th House afflicted by the malefic rays of Mars and Saturn
4. Afflicted Jupiter in the Taurus 12th House ruled by afflicted Venus
5. Afflicted Jupiter retrograde and being domicile ruler and master of the Pisces 10th House controlling her career
6. Saturn retrograde in the 9th House conjunct the MC Point linking government and authority to her career
7. Afflicted Jupiter as domicile ruler and master of the Pisces 10th House in the 12th House of loss indicating she is the cause of her losing the election.
8. Saturn right square afflicted Jupiter indicating she will be demoted, lose her power or lose her position

How is it you didn’t see those things?

Oh, that’s right….you’re not really an astrologer.

“However, it’s also important to note that all candidates have extreme luck due to Jupiter heavily influencing their natal birth chart by transit…”
….”Jupiter is in duplicitous Gemini, indicating that there is more than meets the eye happening behind the scenes, which will be revealed during the upcoming retrograde that begins on November 25….”

What “upcoming retrograde?”

Jupiter is already retrograde. That’s what the R_x symbol means How can you not know that? Oh, that’s right… you’re not really an astrologer so you wouldn’t know what it means.

Jupiter reaches the 2nd station on October 9, 2024, turned retrograde on October 11, 2024, makes the next station on February 3rd, 2025, and turns direct on February 6th, 2025.

If you really were an astrologer you would know how to use and read an ephemeris.

Why did you lie to people? Is is because you’re so sodding incompetent or is because you’re a narcissistic liar?

“Since the Capricorn moon aspects rebellious Uranus, passionate Neptune, and evocative Pluto in the days after the election, the after-effects are going to be extreme when the winner is announced.”

Wrong answer. You’re making things up as you go along and needlessly frightening people but that’s the only way you can get people to pay attention to you. How sad is that?

The line will be drawn in the sand as we head into Mercury retroshade [sic], which begins on November 7, leading us into the actual retrograde that commences on November 25. There may be a demand for a recount or shocking information that comes out at that time, so pay attention to the news — I mean fake news (due to Mercury retroshade [sic] bringing misinformation) we hear then.

Liar.

You’re a goddam liar.

Mercury retrograde does not begin on November 7th. Mercury stations November 25th and turns retrograde November 26th.

You talk about “misinformation” and then you spread disinformation. You get our least coveted award: The Herr Josef Göbbels Propaganda Award.

So, where was this recount or shocking info that came out? If you’d only stop making things up as you go along you wouldn’t embarrass yourself.

“All in all, it’s safe to say that we could be electing the first female president, which is indicated in the birth chart of the US, because we, as a country, are experiencing a Pluto return, which means the transformative planet is returning to the sign and degree it was when the Declaration of Independence was signed.”

There’s no such thing as a “Pluto return” and Pluto means nothing and does nothing in anyone’s chart or any country’s chart. Pluto has nothing to do with “transformation” in spite of your pedantic musings.

However, congratulations are in order, so, congratulations. You’ve proven for us that Pluto does nothing.

“In December 2020 when the Great Conjunction happened — the unification of Jupiter and Saturn that happens every 20 years — Pluto was in the same degree of Aquarius as it is now. Many were eager to usher in a new president as we welcomed the Age of Aquarius.”

Wow. You are really, really pathetic.

Astrological Ages since time immemorial were always based on the constellations, not the signs, and they’re still based on the constellations. That means Astrological Ages are not a uniform 2,160 degrees.

We know the Age of Taurus began in the year 3,760 BCE. Unfortunately, we do not know when the Age of Aries began. We only know that we should have entered it sometime between 1,950 BCE and 1,850 BCE and that a war was fought over the actual start date for the Age of Aries leading to the destruction of the Kingdom of Akkad and the rise of the Amorites (the people incompetents call “Babylonians”).

We know that the constellation Aries is the smallest constellation with a span of 26° and that the Age of Pisces would have started sometime between the year 78 BCE and the year 22 CE.

We know that the constellation Pisces is the largest constellation with a span of 44°. That means the Age of Aquarius will start sometime between the year 3090 and 3190 or in other words, no earlier than 1,065 years from now.

But, hey, keep lying to people, Lisa, because you’re really, really good at lying.

Revolutionary Uranus in Taurus and dreamy Neptune retrograde in Pisces will be in a close orbit of degrees on the day of the election, making the cosmic energy bring radical results.

Bogus interpretation. There’s no authority to support your claims. It what house do “revolutionary Uranus” and “dreamy Neptune” fall? To correctly interpret anything, astrology requires a star, a sign and a house, plus aspects from other stars. How can you not know that? Oh, that’s right, you’re not really an astrologer. You’re a fraud.

Mars will be in its pre-retrograde zone from October 4 to December 6 in Cancer and Leo, with its retrograde starting on December 6 and ending on February 23, 2025. The post-retroshade [sic] clears the energy on May 2, 2025. There will be much resistance in welcoming the President-elect until May 2025. Meaning we can expect to see disruption and little peace.

What a spectacular fail.

There’s no such thing as a “pre-retrograde zone.” That’s fantasy astrology. The reason there was no disruption and lots of peace is because you suck as astrologer and make things up as you go along.

“Astrologically, Kamala Harris and Donald Trump both have luck from Jupiter.”

You lie to yourself so convincingly you can’t even see the truth.

You’re a goddam liar.

You lied by omission.

You omitted and withheld a material fact from your readers, namely, that transiting Jupiter is retrograde. You also lied by omission when you failed or refuse to disclose the material fact that transiting Saturn is retrograde.

Why didn’t you want your readers to know that? Is it because they would ask you what “retrograde” means and you’re so sodding incompetent you don’t know how to interpret a retrograde planet?

Retrograde means that someone (not necessarily you) or some thing suffers a serious set-back, major reversal of fortune or circumstance, is rejected, denied, thwarted, or frustrated, or ruined or destroyed, or falls apart and it means that 100% of the time in 100% of charts no exceptions ever.

The fact that Jupiter is retrograde and the fact that Saturn is retrograde and in a right square to Jupiter tells you there will be a pending disaster for Kamala Harris at some point in her life resulting in her being demoted/fired, or losing her position or losing her power. Your job was to find out when that disaster would happen and you failed because you are not an astrologer.

Winning looks positive for Harris because [a lunar eclipse] it’s setting off her 10th house of career.

Wrong. Wow, you really suck.

First, it was a partial eclipse so it doesn’t count. Second, it was not visible to Kamala who was in the District of Columbia at the time. Finally, an eclipse in the 10th House means someone’s career is destroyed or their reputation is ruined. How could you not know that?

“Well, obviously the prediction below didn’t exactly come to fruition. According to astrologer Lisa Stardust, the outcome could be attributed to a ton of astrological elements.”

Spoken like a true narcissist.

Nothing is ever your fault. There’s always something or someone else to blame for your abject failures.

“Looking at the charts of the United States on the day of the election, the country’s natal Mars in Gemini was aspecting Neptune, which means that it was a very confusing election and a lot of voters were unsure about how they should vote,” she says.

Fascinating. What a great example of incredibly bad astrology.

We don’t want anyone to drink your Reverend Jim Jones Kool-Aid®.

In mundane astrology the 1st House is the people.

Does Mars rule Sagittarius? Nope.

Does Neptune ruler Sagittarius? Nope.

Are Mars or Neptune in the Sagittarius 1st House? Nope.

Contrary to your claim, Mars does not aspect transiting Neptune. It’s the other way around. Transiting Neptune squares Mars and using Modern astrology orbs, Neptune has separated from Mars.

So how could Neptune possibly cause confusion among voters?

Do you want us to call an ambulance? You know, in case you hurt your back moving the goal-posts.

Cite the authority for the interpretation you gave for transiting Neptune square Mars because there are no Modern authorities that claim transiting Neptune square Mars results in confusion.

If anyone is confused, it’s you.

There’s a reason why we posted the Declaration of Independence for Palestine. As we said, ruler of 8th House in the 1st House means they’re indirectly the cause of their own failure.

Look closely at the Sibley Chart. Jupiter ruler of the Sagittarius 1st House in the 8th House means the Colonies are the direct cause of their failure to gain independence, except the Colonies did gain their independence which is proof the Sibley Chart is the wrong chart. As a mundane chart for the U.S. it means the America causes its own destruction.

We sure you’ll certainly be looking for to that.

We want everyone to see how you lied to them:

The beauty of primary predictive methods is that it does not matter which method you use:

• Zodiacal releasing
• Decennials
• Circumnabulations
• Profections
• Rising times

Every single method yields the same conclusion: Harris loses. All 5 transiting planets and both transiting Lights (Moon and Sun) indicate she loses. That’s how blatantly obvious it was.

Not only do you suck as an astrologer, you claim to be a life coach? We shudder at the thought of the lives you harmed with your psycho-babbling nonsense.